Gadget nerds, bloggers, rumormongers, analysts, tech pundits, Samsung's design and engineering teams... all eyes in the tech world will be on Apple this week.
It's the eve of Apple's long-awaited Fall 2014 event. All of my friends, even the non-geeky ones, are eagerly awaiting the announcements from this event-especially the poor guy who's still rocking an iPhone 3GS.
It's been a seemingly interminable length of time since the last Apple event, and as such the rumors for this one have flown fast and furious for months. There are some dead giveaways for this event, but there are also so many huge question marks... perhaps more than for any Apple event since the unveiling of the iPad in early 2010.
The past few days' rumors are below, but first I'll lay out the bigger picture for this upcoming event. I'll also tack on some percentages for how likely I think these rumors are to come true. In the grandest tradition of Apple rumors, these predictions will be based on no real evidence whatsoever.
iPhone 6 - 4.7-inch version: 100%
This is going to be announced and released. Full stop. Unanswered questions: whether a 128 GB model will be available, how good the camera will be, what the battery life will be like, what the display resolution is, and whether this model will be tempting enough to convince millions of iPhone 5 and iPhone 5s owners that the iPhone already in their hands is an obsolete piece of crap.
iPhone 6 - 5.5-inch version: 30%
There have been enough parts leaked for the 4.7-inch iPhone 6 that people have literally assembled (almost) working versions of it. The 5.5-inch model has been far more elusive. There have been parts here and there which may be intended for a device this size, but the unmistakable smoking gun of the 4.7-inch version is definitely missing here.
Some have suggested that Apple may announce this phone but wait a few months before shipping it. That's madness. If this version of the iPhone exists at all, Apple will announce it only if it's a few weeks (at most) away from being on store shelves.
One thing you can count on: if this version of the iPhone 6 is a no-show, then absolutely every anti-Apple pundit in the world will be racing to be FIRST! to claim the iPhone 6 is "disappointing."
Apple wearable thingy: 90%
There's been enough chatter about some kind of Apple wearable being announced (but not necessarily made available just yet) that even a rumor cynic like me can't deny it. Every single rumor about what this thing will look like, what it will be made of, when it will ship, what it will cost, and what it will even be for has been unreliable, often contradictory, and wholly unsubstantiated. Pretty much exactly like the lead-in to the iPhone and iPad announcements. Everyone "knows" that Apple is about to announce something-maybe even something huge-but specifics? No. No one has any clue. However...
"iWatch": 50%
"Wearable thingy" does not necessarily mean "smartwatch." I have a feeling that all of the speculation around this product is going to turn out to be as unimaginative in hindsight as all the pre-announcement punditry about the iPhone and iPad. If all Apple announces in this wearable space is its own take on the godawful smartwatches out there, I'll consider it something of a letdown.
And in the name of all that is holy, please don't let it be called the "iWatch." I've thought that was a monumentally stupid name ever since the first time I heard it, years and years ago. I can't think of any better way for Apple to signify that the post-Jobs era has well and truly begun than by dropping the i-prefix from whatever wearable thingy they announce this week.
Mobile payment system of some sort: 66.6666666667%
Again, this is one of those things that's had too much chatter to ignore. Whether it involves NFC or not is another matter. I'm also guessing this won't be widely available outside of the USA at launch.
Next-gen iPads: 10%
The only reason this isn't a big fat 0% is because I'm giving "accurate" analyst Ming-Chi Kuo some entirely undeserved benefit of the doubt for one of the many predictions he made this week.
Apple HDTV: 0%
Hahahaha, no. Sorry, Mr. Munster.
Something else that the rumormongers utterly failed to predict: 100%
I think Apple genuinely has something up its sleeve this time. Call it a hunch. Or just a wild-assed guess. Potato, potáto.
Apple's rumored iPhone 6 mobile payment system seen as 'most legitimate potential threat' to PayPal (AppleInsider)
"The iPhone 6 is a PayPal killer!!!!!!!" -some analyst
Yeah, how about we wait until this feature is actually confirmed to exist before we start shotgun-blasting hyperbole all over the place?
KGI on iWatch: 8 GB storage, 512 MB RAM, 1.3 and 1.5 inch screen, gold option (9to5 Mac)
"Reliable" Ming-Chi Kuo makes a series of very specific predictions about Apple's supposedly forthcoming wearable thingy. These predictions are so specific that it's going to be very easy to go back and pick them apart when one (or all) of these turn out to be false.
KGI report claims both iPhone 6 models to offer 128GB storage; iPad Air 2 launch on same day (9to5 Mac)
And, once again, this "reliable" analyst has made very specific claims about rumored Apple products... and he's made so many that he's either going to be vindicated later this week or permanently outed as just another sarcastiquote "accurate" analyst. Guess which way I'm guessing the tree will fall?
iWatch With Curved OLED Display to Include NFC for Mobile Payments (MacRumors)
This article is the perfect storm of perennially-unannounced hardware. All it's missing is the Apple HDTV.
U2 says reports of Apple tie-up for 'iPhone 6' are untrue (AppleInsider)
Duh.
Samsung's 'rushed,' 'half-baked' announcements set Apple up for easy victory this fall, analyst says (AppleInsider)
Analyst Brian "iRing" White crawls out from beneath his Inaccurate Apple Analyst Rock of Shame just long enough to predict that Apple's unannounced products will kick the pants off Samsung's announced and/or released products.
Hang on a second. I thought that unannounced products from Apple's competitors were supposed to demolish shipping, successful Apple products! What's going on here? Did I jump universes again? Please tell me this one still has Mila Kunis.
NYT: iWatch to feature flexible display panel, wireless charging, iPhone 6 to have 'one handed mode' (9to5 Mac)
- "Sapphire glass" plus "flexible display" does not compute.
- Huh-huh-huh. "One-handed mode." Uhhh, huh-huh-huh-huh.
Apple reportedly negotiated transaction fee discounts w/ major banks ahead of mobile payment system (9to5 Mac)
Show of hands: if this mobile payment stuff turns out to be for real, how many of you out there think this will be US-only at launch?
Apple's 'iWallet' payments seen as unlikely to earn much money, but will lock in users to iPhone ecosystem (AppleInsider)
This article contains 0 percent actual news and 100 percent speculation. It made my head hurt reading this.
Rear Camera of 5.5-Inch iPhone 6 With Optical Stabilization and Other Parts Shown in New Photos (MacRumors)
There is precisely zero proof offered that this component is destined for a 5.5-inch iPhone.
Apple employees 'have set low expectations' for 'iWatch' battery life - report (AppleInsider)
This report notes that it's entirely possible this is a case of Apple deliberately seeding doubt in advance of knocking it out of the park later this week. As AppleInsider notes, this "only serves to underscore how little is actually known" about this supposedly forthcoming wearable thingy.
Apple Dominating Shipping Capacity Out Of China With New iPhones (TechCrunch)
All the "Apple is DOOMED" moron pundits tend to forget just how insanely influential Apple has become. TechCrunch's piece suggests that Apple is poised to dominate shipping out of China to such an extent that other manufacturers will struggle to perform high-volume exports of products out of their factories, and this sounds not only entirely plausible, it sounds extremely like Tim Cook's Apple.
Apparent Working 4.7-Inch iPhone 6 Reveals Home Screen Layout, Passbook Icon With Payments [Updated] (MacRumors)
This is almost definitely the real deal. Notably absent is a similar leak for the long-rumored 5.5-inch version...
5.5-inch iPhone 6 may run landscape apps with more productive iPad-like interface (9to5 Mac)
While this is cool on the surface, it definitely doesn't offer positive proof that the 5.5-inch iPhone exists. All it proves is that if Apple makes and releases this device, it probably won't have much trouble adapting the existing iOS interface to the larger screen.
And that's a wrap. The next Roundup will be the traditional post-event retrospective.
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